02期作文批改展示来啦本次展示内容为2012年英语二小作文首要先来check一下12年英语二的高文文真题叭 真题 1the table clearly reflects the statistic of staff’s job satisfaction in a certain company. according to the data given above, we canconcludconclude（留心拼写）thatsatisfied with their job’ people is highest among those over 50 years old（本句的主语有点疑问，假定说的是highest，那么主语大约是百分比而并不是人，可以改为the percentage of people satisfied with their jobs is the highest among those over 50 years old.）,at the percentage of 40%. in contrast, the percentage of thosewho dissatisfied（这儿要么用dissatisfied作定语，要么用who are dissatisfied引导无缺的定语从句）with their jobs is about 64% among those in their forties. and the data is the highest among all the three groups.the major determinant ofsatisfiction（留心拼写，satisfaction）lies in people’s living conditions. on the one hand, staff members in their forties usually have to undertake a lot of responsibilities from both their families and careers. therefore,they usually（词组be under pressure,这儿漏了be动词are）under pressure ofpursue（of后边用动词ing，一起留心挣钱的固定分配是making money）money,acquire leader’s appreciate, own high social status,（这儿不太懂想表达的意思，大约get到有点想同辈压力，这样可以运用also because of peer pressure）and so on. so, they have the highestdissatisfication（留心拼写，dissatisfaction）in theirjob（留心单复数，jobs）. on the other hand, people over 50 years old always have theirlife（留心单复数，lives）and careers to be steadied. they have made their life more easy and comfortable, but not to（这儿加to会更适合，不是为了完成究竟方针）achieve the ultimate success.in view of the above reasoning, i am convinced that it is very difficult for everyone to be content with their jobs. and it is advisiable（留心拼写，advisable）that people should adjust their expectations for work and that companies should pay more attention to their staff’swalfare（留心拼写，welfare）.内容逻辑(3分):4言语表达(3分): 4语法基础(3分): 3总分:11分评语 （1）内容逻辑上疑问不大（2）语法表达上不错，有一些亮点词句：undertake responsibilities, in view of the above reasoning, i am convinced that，单个表达需要调整和斟酌（3）语法基础上留心①少量拼写疑问②定语从句③of+doing④名词单复数；全体来说能看出同学在这篇作文里有留心到一些疑问，值得赞誉，一起留心说到的一些小疑问，信赖你下次的高文文会非常好~2this table shows that people ofdefferent（留心拼写，different）age groupspercentage of job satisfaction（该图展示了不一样年纪段的人作业满足度，shows different job satisfaction among people of different age groups，不需要加percentage，反而把整个语句紊乱了哦）.those people over 50 feeling（留心这儿假定用feeling的话，意味着作非谓语，可是实践上整个语句就没有真实的谓语动词了，需要改为feel）good with there（留心拼写，their）jobs,theose（留心拼写，those）people aged between 41 to 50 feeling（这个后边怎么遽然没有了？feel unhappy about their jobs）,those under 40 feeling unclear about their satisfaction with their job same with over 50 years.i think there are several reasons for this. first,they have well paid（这儿应当运用被逼语态，they have been well paid他们拿着很高的薪水，而相同的，主语直接说those people over 50 years old，不必they）those people over 50 years.next,about（这儿留心介词，用as for比照适合，标明“关于….”）those people aged between 41 to 50, they don`t have enough money or time,they only have work in their life（这儿有点必定化了，加一个may only have 会更宛转）.last , those under 40 , they don`t have a good planto（留心介词运用，这儿大约用for）their future.in summary, i suggest reduce working hours and raisepay（这儿用salaries薪水更适合）.this can increaseevery（这儿不需要运用every）employee satisfaction. the company will have a better future.内容逻辑(3分): 4言语表达(3分): 3语法基础(3分): 3总分:10分评语 内容逻辑和言语表达上疑问不大，留心单个选词上的疑问，如salaries，和介词的选择。语法基础上留心：①少量拼写疑问②主语和谓语的分配，主语何时是数据何时是人③谓语动词与非谓语动词④避免过于必定化全体来说能看出同学在这篇作文里相关于前次有前进，值得赞誉哦！下次持续加油！3the table represents thatemployeeof three age groups in a certain companyshow这儿触及到主谓共同的疑问，employee-shows或许employees-show，这儿多个职工主张把employee改为复数方法employeestheir different job satisfaction inresultof a survey. one of the best feelings of their works which are up topercentage奇数可数名词一般需要一个限制词，the percentageof 40 is those people aged over 50. but some people who aged between aged 41 to 50 are the most dissatisfied with their jobs at about percentage of 64. the other group which is aged under 40are留心坚持主谓共同，这个系动词的主语是the other group，所以大约改为isunclear the answer accounts for 50%.in theory, several reasons are behind these situations, but as far as i am concerned, therehavemainreason主谓共同疑问又呈现啦，have- reasons或许has reasonto interpretation. for aged over 50, a majority of employees had become senior manager so that they are more likely to feel good with their jobs. most of the staff between 41 to 50 tend tounhappy成分缺失，be happy/be unhappy，这儿改为tend to be unhappyabout their jobs because of financial pressure for their families. theworkswork意为作业，拼写疑问 workerswhois主谓共同疑问，who是指workers 复数方法要接areunder 40 are lack awareness of career planning and that’s why they didn’t feel great with their positions.in my opinion,company定冠词别忘掉啦，the companyshould take some actions to improve their employee’s satisfaction such as increasing salaries and benefits.内容逻辑(3分): 4言语表达(3分): 3.5语法基础(3分): 2总分:9.5分评语 不错的，文章的规划和逻辑没有疑问，几个从句运用也没有语法差错。还需要留心一下疑问：1、应试写作中主张首行缩进噢。2、一个比照显着的语法疑问，主谓共同。避免类似疑问的呈现，需要再写完后细心查看，分析语句的成分。清楚语句的主语，根据主语的单复数抉择谓语动词运用第三人称仍是原形。3、奇数可数名词前不加冠词的情况有：专有名词和名词前有指示代词和描述词物主代词，this和that,my,your等；标明笼统名词，物质名词前可不加冠词，如men are cruel,man is kind.加定冠词的情况：定冠词the，特指或人或物或许某些人或某些物。例如the book，特指那本书；世界上绝无仅有的事物，比方the sun.太阳；用在从头说到的人或物前，比方i have a car. the car is red.我有一辆车。这辆车是赤色的。用在序数词，描述词最高档的前面；用在某些描述词前，标明一类人，比方the poor穷户。这些是不完全罗列，碰到特别的也可以归纳堆集下来。文中最终一段的company是咱们分析其职工满足度的那个公司，需要定冠词the company。4、可以试着堆集一些不是那么常见的短语。比方总结有些，as a consequence；given the discussion above；on balance等等。4the table vividly demonstratesemployee’s可数名词，奇数的话前面要加不定冠词an，这大约是复数，改成 employees ‘job satisfaction of threegroupgroupsin a certain company.specifically speaking,64%of employees aged from 41 to 50 are dissatisfied with their job.yet,there are only 10% employees over 50 years old are not satisfied with their job.as a matter of fact,whatauthor这画表的用作者不太适合，可以用 the investigator查询者。因为你奇数可数名词前面没有不定冠词或 许定冠词。彼此晓得，要加上the。tries to show us is more than simple statistics.the table is meant to lead us to seek some reasons why employees have obvious differences in job satisfaction condition.to begin with,there ismuch鉴于后边的语境你用的more，这也大约是more吧。life stress in employees aged from 41 to 50,including raise their children and senior parents.so,they are more dissatisfied with their job.next,tt小写。hose over 50 years old nearly haven’t any chancethat这不契合定于从句哈，英语that语义上指的是chace，不是后半句的主语。直接把that换成to，就是一个短语，就挺好的。get a job promotion.thus,there are commonphenomenon复数: phenomenaabout they are satisfied with their job.这句话后边about不这么用哈。这样表达比照好哈: it is a common phenomenon they are satisfied with their work.employ大约用名词employmentis the basic ofcountry’sprosperity.要否则复数，countries ‘，要否则奇数，county 前面加不定冠词an。on the one hand,we need to continuously learntolearn，及物动词，删掉towork skills toimproving表意图，to加动词原形，用improveour satisfaction of job.on the other hand,the初度呈现后边的名词，不必定冠词the。relevant government departments should properly increasemore employ opportunity.opportunity可数名词，一般用复数，改成opportunities 。内容逻辑(3分): 4言语表达(3分): 3语法基础(3分):2.5总分:9.5分评语 逻辑很理解，第一段描绘，第二段分析证明，第三段结束。很不错！言语上，还需要再多下功夫。可数名词不可以数名词的区别和单复数，好几处犯错了。主张要点看一下。要点说一下不定冠词的运用，假定你有一个名词是奇数，前面你没有用定冠词the或许其他的限制成分，比方our，tom’s这种，这个奇数可数名词前面必定是要有不定冠词a/an的，紧记呈现单单就有一个可数名词的情况。这次极好地躲避了串句的情况，较前次表达上有前进！更多信息，请联络咱们的英语小辅佐哦～更多的信息，请联络咱们的英语小辅佐小小和杨杨哦～（左）爱传达英语小辅佐杨杨（aichuanbo2022） （右）爱传达英语小辅佐小小（aichuanbo2023） 往期回想??作业展示｜2012年考研英语一高文文作业材料|2012年考研英语高文文作业展示｜2012年考研英语一小作文作业展示｜2012年考研英语二小作文作业材料|2012年考研英语小作文
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